The One Where I Celebrate My Mother

    If you know me at all, you know that I am a momma's boy. Always have been, always will be. Her loving guidance has made me into who I am (or, at least the good parts of me) and it is because of her that I have avoided a lot of potentially huge life mistakes. Do not get me wrong, my father is one of my two biggest heroes (my grandfather is the other, in case you actually care) and if I am 1/10th of the man and father he is when I am older, I will consider my life a smashing success. He is absolutely a driving force in my life, but this post is about my mother, so I will focus on her.

    What makes a mother great? Being supportive? Being available? Being a loyal mother and wife? Being a mix of correcting yet affectionate? All of the above? I honestly cannot figure out what makes my mother so FREAKING wonderful. She has so many admirable qualities. Just ask any of her family members, friends, patients, or the random strangers she seems to make friends with instantly. Have you ever heard someone say something bad about her? Besides the fact that I would, quite literally, put them 'in the ground' if they dared to besmirch her name, I doubt anyone can materially bring a charge against her. That is one key ideal she instilled in me at a young age; popularity changes, having a good name is for a lifetime. She is willing to do anything to maintain her integrity, even if it means taking a hard stance on an unpopular issue. Whenever I mention wanting to take a shortcut or find a less ethical way around a problem, she is quick to ask me about the ramifications those actions would have on my witness and my image. She loves using the analogy of hats. We all get a 'white hat', which symbolizes goodness, respectability, and trustworthiness. When we do something wrong, that gets traded for a 'black hat' which everyone can see and is extremely tough to get rid of for a second white hat. The more and more I grow up, the more and more I realize she is right. Because of her, I am working to be someone who exudes honesty and integrity.
     Adding to that, my mother has helped me grow spiritually. Growing up, she would read me the Bible, Narnia, Max Lucado books, and other stories that helped me understand basic theology. She stressed the importance of prayer, faithful church attendance and being active in both service to the church and others in the outside world. My mother is still very involved in my home church, and she will always be the best Sunday School teacher I ever had, teaching me the order of the books of the Bible or teaching me the words to that "I've got the joy, joy, joy down in my heart. Where? Down in my heart. Where? Down in my heart" song. (Side-note, any Faith Reformed Church reader must know exactly what song I am referring to, or you need to re-attend 1st grade Sunday School.) As much as I hated it growing up, I now really appreciate her after-dinner devotionals. (I am going to regret writing that last sentence, aren't I, mother?) Her insightful wisdom often brought me back to solid truth time and time again. I can still picture different things she said to me during extremely difficult times. How she is that wise is beyond me, but I know how much it has meant to her three children. Because of her, I am a strong Christian who desires a better relationship with my Savior.
       Fun fact: I was never grounded as a child. I think the main reason is that she knew she did such a great job raising us that saying "I am disappointed in you" was the worst thing we could ever her from her. That was all we needed to hear to fall back in line. In fact, disappointing her is still one of my biggest fears. Seriously. I know that she has forgiven me for every bad thing I did to her growing up- which is amazing in and of itself- but I still live with such a respect for her that I often stop myself before doing something thinking "how would mom react to this?" I firmly believe that respect is the biggest ideal a parent should instill in their children, and she is masterful at still teaching me to respect God, family, country, and those around me. For example, I am still uncomfortable referring to adults as anything other than Mr./Mrs./Dr. or sir/ma'am, even though many adults want me to call them by their first names. Always vote-- its a sign of respect to my country. Always be courteous and polite. Always act in a manner that affirms and respects the persons around you. Because of her, I strive to be a respectful, proper gentleman.
       In case you have never talked with her, Ellen Nic is one incredibly smart lady. She knows everything about everything about everything. Proper grammar rules were thrown at me from a young age. She instructed me to work hard in school, even when it was boring and dry. She encouraged me to do extracurricular activities, such as learning to play the piano, baseball, basketball and tennis. She loves talking with me about any subject from politics to sports to science, even if she is not sure exactly what a "wOBA" is; she just wants to hear about our passions and learn more from us. Her thirst for knowledge has rubbed off on her children, and we are all college educated in a large part because of her pushing us towards our scholarly pursuits. Because of her, I am a smarter, educated person who loves learning.
      Having a servants heart is an underrated quality. It is not glorifying, and society seems to prefer flashy shows of service over quietly doing what needs to get done without ever thinking about if anyone is noticing. My mother fits squarely in the "quietly doing what needs to get done" category. Working as a nurse in Hazard, Kentucky for several years despite the fact she graduated from Duke. Taking me, when I was younger, to the Rescue Mission, weekends with the homeless in the Bronx, or picking up trash on the side of the road outside of our house. Caring for my grandmother who is in poor health. Taking food- and a good word- to those who are sick and needy. Constantly having people over to the house to talk and invest in emotionally. Remaining a faithful, serving wife and mother despite many, many challenges thrown at my family. Take your pick. All true examples. All her. Because of her, I want to be a better servant to a society that needs help.
       Many, many, many more words could be written about many, many, many more positive attributes about Ellen Nic, but I think the above list captures a tiny fraction of what she means to so many people. Scripture describes the ideal woman in Proverbs 31. I have always secretly called it "Mom's chapter" because of how applicable it is. Go read it, and see how right I am.
       Do not even bother telling me you have the best mother. There is only one 'best mother' and her name is Ellen Nicodemus. Mom, because of you, you have three children who adore you greatly. Because of you, we are God-fearing people who desire real relationships with people. Because of you, we have grown in amazing ways. Because of you, we are better people. Mom, have a wonderful Mother's Day. Mom, I love you.